小白,走好!

  我家的小白,走了……
  自元宵走出後,已是三日未歸。直到昨天下午,阿公想去蕉林看看,結果卻在蕉林的草叢中發現了小白的遺體。雙眼緊閉,已是渾身冰涼,四肢僵硬了。看來已是亡去多時了。
  家裏養小白應該是有四五年了吧。它雖說叫小白,但頭卻是黑色的,背部也有幾塊黑色的斑點。眼睛固然小小的,但卻是炯炯有神。當初還是舅父不知從何處帶回來的,才幾個月大。這隻小狗不同以往養過的,不用教太多便非常聽話了。我能想起它唯一做過的一件壞事是把我晾在階前的波鞋的鞋帶給咬斷了,真是個淘氣鬼!
  夜晚它是非常警醒的,每每聽到異響,便以洪亮而清澈的聲響吠之。還記得有次晚飯後,見它伏在臺階上,表情甚是可愛,於是輕輕撫摸着它的頭。想必它正在熟睡中,被我的舉動嚇壞了,倏地下躥了起來逃走,驚恐地吠了幾聲,回頭見原來是我,便又搖着尾巴匆匆跑來舐我的腳。
  每次回家,無論是深夜,還是日頭,只要聽到響聲,它總是第一時間衝向我奔來。我也總是摸摸它烏黑的腦袋予以回報,這樣它的尾巴搖得更快了,似乎都要把屁股摔出去了。它在白天喜歡曬太陽,若是見我來逗它,它便四肢朝天地示意叫我幫它撓撓它的肚子。看着它的樣子,很是享受呢!
  可是到如今,一切戛然皆是夢了,徒留回憶矣,滿腹心事,又可與胡訴說?唯聽窗外瀟瀟冷雨。我所能做的,便是願它在天堂安好,那裏或無嚴寒酷暑,一切都美好於人間。來世有緣者,我們再相見吧!我會十分想念你的,小白!

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小白,走好!

雜記

  昨日午至張老師居所,契闊談宴,由書法而至做人。下午隨諸小友一同上課。時光荏苒,真如白駒過隙,自四歲半從師學書以來,累十二年餘,風雨無阻,無奈後逮高三學業繁雜而綴,後更因背鄉之省外讀書而不得跟隨。如今再來學堂,竟又是一個七年。恩師堂上所言,仍是與記憶之中無二。然而物換星移幾度秋,學生早已不同當年。曩時之同窗,至今恐已是天南地北,不得再見。留得通信方式者更無幾人,甚爲可惜!
  今日略有雅興,練字不覺之中逾半日。午前稍動筆墨,覺意猶未盡。食晏後,再執筆椽,一抒翰墨之情。所恨廢紙無數,竟無一滿意者。或衰於字,或失於章法。數添墨,又竭。不覺早已華燈盡上,月昃西阿。停筆始覺肚飢不已,只得到此爲止,他日再續。既結緣翰墨,則爲一生翰墨人。

雜記

吾頭

今日頭部復遇強烈撞擊,撞擊之後,瞬間視力喪失,但旋即雙目又重見光明。此番已是今歲第二次有這等經歷矣。前次皆因守門動作甚猛而頭部狠砸至桂操至破爛流丟一片假草地上,算是咎由自取。這回仍是守門,然場地變更至工學部之草場,怎奈與人狠狠相撞。如今想起,應言句Cám ơn người có lòng tốt才是,倘若太陽穴遭猛擊,慮及彼時雙方速度差,我必然休克,甚者更嚴重。

當時值訓練中,阿迪力帶球繞桿後起速欲射門,我視作單刀球,是故為封死角度便迅速出擊,然後記憶已然蒙龍難憶,相撞細節更不得知曉。簡而述之,我將球破壞掉之一瞬間,其膝恰好擊中了我右耳後側枕骨。因而剎那間我兩眼一黑,所幸旋即恢復視力……

我疼痛難持,於是唯有委棄訓練而稍為休息了。活動頭部,方發覺頭不可右轉,否則便十分疼痛。阿迪力亦受傷而無法訓練,撞擊之後其行走蹣跚然。秋風起,冷雨霏霏。身上衣物早已被雨水打得透濕,益覺寒冷刺骨。所幸訓練不久即結束可廻寢室已。

夜晚中,前半段尚覺無事,叵耐入深夜方覺得暈暈沉沉。莫不成又是輕微腦震蕩?莫胡思了,尚無嘔吐之狀。此番經歷,當值一記。歲在辛卯,九月初三日。若天朗氣清,薄暮時分本可分明見一彎月牙,狀如扁舟,低垂於空。而今值陰雨,不可得見。遙想當年樂天曾於某歲九月初三日題詩一首,現附之以饗於己:


《暮江訡》

一道殘陽鋪水中,半江瑟瑟半江紅。
可憐九月初三夜,露似真珠月似弓。

吾頭

My Dreaming Pet

I used to raise several pets at home, including three red-eared sliders (Latin: Trachemys scripta elegans), several golden fish, two wild fierce fish of the same kind hunted in a brook in Sưởi Sinh Hạ near my ông ngoại’s house. In fact I have also raised numerous tadpoles after natuarally hatching, yet my dad got angry with them and poured all of them into the toilet… >< I have been pretty sad for a rather long period of time.

All of my pets’ faith was proved to be miserable, in that none of them survived for long at the end. The most “long-lived” was a red-eared slider, who has been alive for more than two years before his final death. A delicate secret burial ceremony was specially held by myself in honor of one of my best companions.

Anybody who’s familiar with me understand that I’m an apiphile. How come? Perhaps the character Monkey King (孫悟空, Sun Ngử Không) in the book called 《西遊記》 (Journey to the West) has been fascinating me to an extreme extend since my very early childhood. I’ve been mimicking his deeds as well, according to the vivid character starred by 六小齡童. So all of my classmates during primary school addressed me 猴哥, ha… Up to date it’s been my permanent honor and sweetness in my heart, indeed my forever fortune.

I can’t help but yet again flamboyantly show my portrait disguised as the Monkey King here.

Never get confused! Definitely it’s me! I’ve been told that I look a bit like Andy Lau, or Daniel Wu. Unluckily I show no interest in these guys whatsoever. Yet I’d be pretty glad once somebody tells me that I look like the Monkey King!

I’ve been dreaming of raising a kind of apes at home. My most ideal partner will be — a chimpanzee or a bonobo! These creatures look very lovely and cute as a human baby. They share high similarity with human beings. Whenever I feel blue, I can heartedly confide with them. Nothing could be even better!

A Chinese proverbs goes as 人心隔肚皮, which means that hardly could one understands what your so-called friend is thinking about especially when you’re stuck in quagmire. Maybe your friend is thinking about something malicious to harden the dilemma or the difficulty you’re suffering through and encountering, but still pretends to be kind-hearted. In TV we often see ghosts or vampires to hurt or kill people, however, I think sometimes human beings would be even more malevolent than those fiends or demons. When the fiends appear, you’ll immediately know their grisly nature. On the contrary, when a person stands in front of you, you won’t at once know him/her if this guy is devil or kind-hearted. In many cases a devil person pretends to be a kind man, probably you even regard him/her as your close friend, but when you’re confronted with hard time, his/her devil character is eventually revealed and the guy acts to hurt you to benefit him/herself. The more wretched you become, the happier the devil guy will be. If you fall into the inferno, the devil guy will fully enjoy their deeds and the delightment climbs up to climax.

With the pets you don’t have to worry about these. If the host does good to the lovely chimp, the lovely just becomes truly pleased and does kindness back to the host sincerely. They know how to show back appreciation.

Taken from Wikipedia. Author: Thomas Lersch
My Dreaming Pet

無題

窗外明月高懸,其光之亮,以致尋彗無法進行。今日凌晨停止工作一次,故敢深夜而未睡下。Perseids?誠然大清,但已無精力去顧及,因而至今IMO正式觀測報告仍不會填寫。

今日姐、姐夫及小外甥將廻日本,昨日夜家族一大堆人聚餐,盤盤近乎皆高檔海鮮。我自酌幾盃黃酒小品。飯迄拍合照,欲惡搞,不意愈覺腹痛,唯有去nhà vệ sinh解決之,果然tiêu chảy!實下午已現警告了,卻一嘴饞而再遇盃具。大囧,出來人都散掉了……算罷。

Anyway,祝姐一家三口回程路一路平安哦!明年5月底待我再去過去探親去。

想來一日只得廿四小時,太短!為何不再長些?尚有托福需準備,還有總計一千多張transiting exoplanet的圖檔未處理歸化,亦有一些理論推導未完成。其路曼曼,爭分奪秒,當上下求索之。

這一生不知能做出什麽有意義的事,不管旁人目光及議論,不汲汲於名利與富貴,我自走自己的路,追求己之所愛。旁人之嘲笑於我而言早已習慣,更不會介意。至于嘉獎?不過是耳邊風罷了。

我乃是一獨行俠,於茫茫迷霧及沉沉黑暗中踽踽探索未知,自由自在,無拘無束,不服鳳凰管,不受麒麟轄,善哉善哉!

無題

臨七夕雜談

今日被媽叫去救火——乞巧演出要個人現場揮毫。說實話,本來我不想去的,風頭我是不愿意出的,但是請我幫忙的是媽,不好拒絕,於是硬著頭皮去了。

坐535路巴士去,誰知司機東川路不停直接開到總站,我憑著感覺兜兜轉轉,不料竟然越走越遠,一直走到了越秀南。此時天色漸昏沈,須臾大雨傾盆,加之雨具未攜,行走不得。一小時後雨止,雨過天晴……又走到文明路,搭上了媽單位同事的車才去到英雄廣場。

演出到到一半我上臺。那宣紙因為之前下雨之故而潤濕了,我手一撥欲撫平皺紋不意宣紙爛掉大半,囧……旁邊的靚女趕忙幫忙換了一張,她一撥,又爛多次……我不管,照寫。寫完感覺馬馬虎虎,氣勢還算是有的,還算沒丟架。就是那墨汁溝水太多,化得厲害,後面被我吃透便無再有事。

遙想小時候曾立有大志,言此生必要超過書聖。今觀之,仍去之甚遠,人生雖無常多舛,算來應已逾五分之一的人生。勤奮恐不遜於書聖,倘也有一池水供我洗筆,水亦已黑了。恐是「悟」劣。

書無性情而死,寫死字者,百年不得真諦。書聖云:

「夫書者,玄妙之伎也,若非通人志士,學無及之。大抵書須存思,余覽李斯等論筆勢,及鐘繇書,骨甚是不輕,恐子孫不記,故敘而論之。
「夫 書,不貴平正安穩。先須用筆,有偃有仰,有欹有斜,或小或大,或長或短。凡作一字,或類篆籀,或似鵠頭;或如散,或近八分;或如蟲食木葉,或如水中科 斗;或如壯士佩劍,或似婦女纖麗。欲書先構筋力,然後裝束,必注意詳雅起發,綿密疏闊相間。每作一點,必須懸手作之,或作一波,抑而後曳。每作一字,須用 數種意:或橫畫似八分,而發如篆籀;或豎牽如深林之喬木,而屈折如鋼鉤;或上尖如枯桿,或下細如針芒;或轉側之勢似飛鳥空墜,或稜側之形如流水激來。作一 字,橫豎相向;作一行,明媚相承。第一須存筋藏鋒,滅跡隱端。用尖筆須落鋒混成,無使毫露浮怯;舉新筆爽爽若神,即不求於點畫瑕玷也。若作一紙之書,須字 字意別,勿使相同。若書虛紙,用強筆;若書強紙,用弱筆:強弱不等,則蹉跌不入。
「凡書貴乎沉靜,令意在筆前,字居心後,未作之 始,結思成矣。仍下筆不用急,故須遲。何也?筆是將軍,故須遲重。心欲急不宜遲,何也?心是箭鋒,箭不欲遲,遲則中物不入。夫字有緩急,一字之中何者有緩 急?至如「烏」字,下手一點,點須急,橫直即須遲,欲「烏」之腳急,斯乃取形勢也。每書欲十遲五急,十曲五直,十藏五出,十起五伏,方可謂書。若直筆急牽 裹,此暫視似書,久味無力。仍須用筆著墨,不過三分,不得深浸,毛弱無力。墨用松節同研,久久不動彌佳矣。」

幸好知自己問題,為時未晚!

昨日深夜久雨初晴,然本欲凌晨起身尋彗,故置相機於戶外自動拍攝,目標為牛郎織女。今日檢視圖片,竟發現幸運地捕獲一顆約莫-6等的火流星,大致由牛郎飛嚮織女。不由地想起了秦觀的那首詞——《鵲橋仙》:

「纖雲巧弄,飛星傳恨,銀漢迢迢暗度。金風玉露一相逢,便勝卻人間無數。

「柔情似水,佳期如夢,忍顧鵲橋歸路。兩情若是久長時,又豈在朝朝暮暮。」

天有情,未見天老。而今未到七夕,牛郎早已按耐不住先送秋波與織女。

我?傷不起,再都不敢送咯,哈哈……

臨七夕雜談

Fiasco

Today has witnessed another fiasco in my life time. I felt intensely disappointed about my performance in da GRE test after the conclusion. Almost as da first ppl going out da exam centre, feeling my head really ache and heavy, I juz tried to flee away as soon as possible. Sigh… Probably it marks a great turning point in my life, and mayb hereafter I’l deviate from my dreams further and further. I must confess tht I’m no an optimistic, as I often make underestimates. However, it’s much different from what I used to b; in fact, I tended to b sanguine with myself before when I was a child. After so many pummelings, I gradually n finally became somber. I was too naive; this world’s harsh for me. For many times I tried to escape n get rid of da mundaneness, yet only vainly. I clearly remember my vower in my childhood tht when growing up I’d choose to b a recluse, living in somewhere teemed with dense tropical jungle, without pains, anxieties, irk, reputation or abuse, juz myself alone, everyday accompanying perky animals, beholding blooming n desiccation of flowers until da day when I fell to da ground unconsciously, kissed by d earth mottled with withered leaves, flowers, as well as other remnants, whereby I eventually meet my doom, n Charon will fery my soul across da Styx to d underground world Erebus, da relm dominated by King Hades. Day after day, my corpse decomposes n mold with da soil. Indeed it’s a way of death tht is one of da most romantic as far as I can see.

But how my doom will truly b? I really don’t know. I feel pretty tired.

Now I find tht my slightly deformed right knee joint n left foot-bone, attributed to injuries when playing soccer, become even protruding than before. I’m glad tht I haven’t become disable thus far, thou some doctors hav seriously warned me n prognosticated tht years later I may well suffer from paralyzation of my legs due to abnormalities in my vertebral column due to injuries in sports as long as no sufficient care or measure is taken.

That’s my humble life…

I think, paradoxically, I’m not too pessimistic yet, in that every time when seeing da word “humble”, great characters such as Jean-Loius Pons n Joseph von Fraunhoffer come to my mind swiftly. Since my early childhood, they’v been my idols tht propelled n enliven me when I was entangled by mesh of gloom. I know I’v lost da very opportunity to become any of them, But, more importantly, they’r still in my mind, firmly, n clearly.

Fiasco